The last couple of weeks we talked about where to put your attention. This week, we get to the good stuff. This week it’s all about adventure and anticipation.
Imagine if you will, going on a first date with a guy or gal you consider lackluster. Maybe he’s just not your usual type, maybe you don’t feel the chemistry, but in a weak moment, you say yes. As the date approaches you begin to dread it more and more. And just when you’re about to back out of it, you open up your phone to find a text message from him:
“Hey, I remembered you saying how you liked French food. I found the best French restaurant in the city. It’s supposed to be romantic and they are well-known for making a killer version of a classic French desert… Can you guess which one? See you then!”
Now your sort of intrigued and touched. Romantic dinner at a restaurant you’ve never
been to, eating food you happen to love? Um, yes please. Plus he remembered you saying what you liked. He was actually paying attention to you.
So you decide not to bail on the date. And a day or so before the big night, you find this text from him:
“Hey, I just wanted to let you know to make sure to bring a pair of comfortable shoes Friday night. I found a little secret city garden within walking distance of the restaurant. I know you like gardens and being outdoors. I thought we’d check it out. They light it up at night and it’s supposed to be spectacular. See you then!”
Now, you’re actually excited about this date. You adore secret nature spots in the city, and walking after dinner and talking to him should be a lot of fun. In fact, this guy is starting to seem more and more like Mr. Right.
So what happened? How did you go from bored and filled with dread to being enticed and seduced, –excited even about this date with this great guy? Well, your date knew the power of anticipation.
He listened and paid attention to what you liked and wanted, and then he set about making that happen, all while enticing you with details along the way. It’s the perfect recipe for anticipation. And you can use that same recipe to entice, seduce and anticipate your own life.
Why did I chose a lackluster first date with a so-so guy or gal? For a very good reason. So many of us approach our lives with the same sort of enthusiasm we have for going on a first date with someone were just not that into. That is to say, we dread, complain, drag our feet or bail on it. Go on a date with myself? Ugh, do I have to?
We often expect our lives to just show up for us– to be exciting and fun, while we kick back and relax. Our lives are just supposed to come to us magically ready made. But if you don’t invest in your life? If you don’t show up for it? It will never show up for you.
So I want you to take a month to plan little weekend adventure dates for yourself (although you can definitely bring others along, but you must be the planner of the event). The hard work is already done. You’ve been journaling about all the things you like, love and long for for a couple of weeks now. Now all you have to do is take that information and use it to create the perfect little slice of life adventure for yourself.
If you’re craving quiet “me” time, take a good book and head to Starbucks. Put the phone on silent do-not-disturb mode and read, sip coffee and bliss out for an hour. If life is a little dull and you have fond memories of your life of culture, as a fine arts student in college, get yourself on weekend date to a play, an art show, a museum, anything that scratches the itch.
The key is to plan it in advance and mark that baby out on your schedule. Next you must do the hardest part of all. You must actually show up for yourself. If you make the date sound like so much delicious fun than it will be easier for you to show up, but, in the end you also simply make it a priority. You must show up for your life first, before it will be willing to show up for you.
Have fun and see you next week!